Friday, January 25, 2008

fact


I can just look at my little boy and know unequivocally that he does not belong to me.

Sometimes I wish with great ferocity that he did, and other times I'm so relieved he doesn't I can barely keep from weeping. But either way, the fact remains.

I knew it early on, maybe even from the moment they placed his slick, pink body on mine, that although he is my son, he is a soul apart from me with his own gifts and purpose.

I am writing this down now in case there is a time I forget it, when I try to steer him toward something that is my challenge and not his, for when I am hunched over from trying to carry his pain. Even when I want it to be different, maintaining this clarity is helpful, dare I say, calming.

2 comments:

Barbara said...

Amen.

bobbie said...

Yes, it is sometimes difficult to remember when you are aching to steer your child in some direction he does not want to see. But never fear - he will go his own way.
- Mom

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